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MINIATURE CREATURE FEATURES.

Posted on October 25, 2010 6 Comments

Who’s your pick of the litter?
Who would be your friend to the end?

OK, besides ‘Unsolved Mysteries’ host Robert Stack, and maybe the ‘Monster Truck Rally’ voice-over guy, this man, Percy Rodrigues, has the most electrifying and spine-chilling voice I’ve ever heard. Rodrigues was the go-to guy for 70’s and 80’s horror movie trailers and you can hear him in trailers for some of the best films of the genre; ‘Jaws’, ‘Return of the Living Dead’, ‘Chopping Mall’, ‘Children of the Corn’, ‘Creepshow 2’, ‘The Gate’, ‘Popcorn’, ‘Night of the Creeps’ and a couple ‘Friday the 13th’ films.

His rich, deep voice combined with incredible dramatic pauses made for the perfect delivery. Forget about heavy metal singers trying to sound tough and evil, you could give Rodrigues a summary about flowers & lambs and a microphone and he could scare the pants off anyone, with calmness and ease.

The following are my top 6 favorite Percy Rodrigues-voiced horror movie trailers…

Exhibit 6: Chopping Mall (1986)
“Chopping Mall, where shopping…costs you an arm…and a leg.”

Exhibit 5: They Came From Within (1975)

“If this picture doesn’t make you scream and squirm, you’d better see a psychiatrist….quick.”

Exhibit 4: Creepshow 2 (1987)

“So don’t just sit there…..walk…drive….swim if you have to. But whatever you do, don’t take your time. Because the scares come twice as quickly in………Creepshow 2.”

Exhibit 3: House (1986)

“House…..enter…at your owwwwwn risk.”

Exhibit 2: The Stuff (1985)

JUST WATCH…

Exhibit 1: The Gate (1987)

“There is a passageway. To the most evil place you can imagine. A gate….behind which the demons wait….to take back what was once theirs.”

THE DRIVE.

Posted on October 18, 2010 6 Comments

It remains a staple of the genre and The Shining still stands on its own for a number of reasons. From the opening titles of the film, no time is wasted in kicking you into an almost hypnotic state, bringing immense feelings of isolation. The atmosphere of this film is already heavy. Society and any trace of civilization are left far behind. The camera swoops over a lake and finds itself following a VW Beetle through endless windy road. Then we’re flown over tall pines, mountainsides and snow-brushed land. Only miles of bleak landscape and the vast unknown lie ahead.

The eerie concoction of Stanley Kubrick’s magnificent style of filmmaking plus Wendy Carlos’s daunting score create an ambiance that is unforgettable. To me, out of the two driving scenes to the hotel, the following track from the film’s soundtrack was always just a little more frightening. ‘Rocky Mountains’ plays during the Torrance family’s long drive up to the hotel when they’re having a discussion about the mountain air….and cannibalism.

OBSESSED.

Posted on October 15, 2010 1 Comment

Examine the complete assortment of photos at this location.

GATEKEEPER: CHAINS.

Posted on October 14, 2010 1 Comment

Fresh off the bus that just pulled into these dusty campgrounds (see previous post) is Gatekeeper with their new video for ‘Chains’. Each of the 6 tracks from their upcoming EP ‘Giza’, will be accompanied by a video directed by Thunder Horse Video, which will be released on a limited edition VHS tape. ‘Chains’ is video 1 of 6.

[FULLSCREEN IS MANDATORY]

Inspired by the sounds and visions of forgotten sci-fi film scores, fantasy games and arcade imagery, Gatekeeper has created its own morbidly deranged discotheque, a vivid flight of fancy in which the conventions of techno, Chicago house, italo-disco and industrial are transfigured into one phantasmagorical adventure, populated by hushed screams, Gregorian dungeon chants and cinematic washes of mammoth sound.

‘Giza’ finds the band advancing into more exotic, outlandish territory, as well as fusing their earlier disco leanings with a faster-paced, more club-oriented approach, demonstrated in the arcade biker theme of ‘Chains’, haunted melody swirls of ‘Storm Column’ and ‘Serpent’, or the feverish, nightmare-ridden after-hours romp of ‘Mirage’.

LP is released 12/13/2010 which you can pre-order here.

CAMP TNUC.

Posted on October 12, 2010 1 Comment

A word to the wise: if you’ve got a tight little package, have a slightly obnoxious attitude and think skinny dipping alone in a lake at night is normal, then YOU are welcomed to a stay at Camp TNUC this October. All month long there will be no shortage of teenage mutilation, foggy lakes, masked psychopaths, bearded terror and little surprises around every corner.

Year after year, it never fails. The air is brisker, the days are darker, and the nights are longer. A yearning for being by a lake, growing a beard and chopping lumber fills my soul. The rustling of damp leaves and creaky floorboards are music to my ears. It’s these things, plus of course the horror stereotypes and cliches, that fuel the campfire at Camp TNUC…

Cars broken down and/or never starting up.
Cats jumping out of nowhere.
No one ever believing your story.
Cops always showing up too late.
Running toward the woods to escape from a killer.
Attractive girls/black people dying first.

Ghouls, scream queens, creepers and creepettes, prepare yourselves for only the baddest and the raddest of treats all month long…all leading up to a mega-exclusive mix-tape at the end of the month being composed by a certain German humanoid (who’s familiar around these parts) and a young band from Toronto, Canada. Additionally, on the right-column you will find showtimes to all worthy horror film events in the Los Angeles/Southern California area. My apologies to those of you outside the vicinity, but i’m sure there are some events like ‘bobbing for apples’ or ‘pin the tail on the donkey’ that will surely be satisfying! Just kidding. We love you all. Stay tuned ghouls and ghoulettes!

WHO WILL SURVIVE? AND WHAT WILL BE LEFT OF THEM?