WET-HOT-TNUC-SUMMER, PART 4.

knockout

Welcome to another edition of WET-HOT-TNUC-SUMMER, when your pizza-loving, neanderthal of an Uncle chooses his current favorite anthems of the summer. As he reclines back in his ripped-sleeve wetsuit by Body Glove, reminiscing about all the local-long-butt inspecting he got done this summer, these are the songs that echo in his mind.

#1 Sunglasses Kid – Knockout feat. Phaserland
secret-admirer

Here’s a certified breakout-of-summer-school war cry. When you’re cooped up all day watching the sweat pour off Vice Principal Gills’ neck, you need a release like no other once that buzzer rings. THIS IS IT. You arrive home, call Debbie, yell up to mom to fire up the station wagon and get ready for a jam-packed night of arcade games, mini golf, pool hopping, showing her your motorcycle that really isn’t yours and making out in the backyard treehouse under the stars. Get it here.

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#2 The Payola$ – Eyes of a Stranger
best looking people on earth

I could have SWORN this song was used in the movie Cocktail, so last week when it played on the deck of TNUC’s 8th Annual “Boob Cruise” I quickly hopped out of the pool and ran stark naked to my luxury, wood paneled, Manimal Dungeon suite. Snacking on red rope licorice and quaaludes, I watched my VHS of Cocktail repeatedly until dawn. Well, it must have been a case of too much sun and day-dreaming about Elisabeth Shue, because “Eyes of a Stranger” is NOT from the Cocktail soundtrack! The song was actually featured in both Valley Girl and an episode of Miami Vice. It’s such a premiere anthem for locking eyes with a bronzed lover on the beach, just like those two pictured above.

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#3 The Midnight – Crockett’s Revenge
the man

We knew The Midnight were prepping something tremendous when their track ‘Vampires’ came across TNUC FM airwaves last month, but I honestly never expected the juicy, emotional, sexually charged debut album that is “Endless Summer”. From beginning to end these songs evoke feelings ranging from taking bikes over the dunes with your friends, to riding the Cyclone with your dream girl at Rocky Point. It was excruciatingly tough to just pick one song – but if I was held at gunpoint by Sonny Crockett while face-to-face with his pet alligator, Elvis – I’d choose “Crockett’s Revenge”. It’s refreshing to hear a band that doesn’t treat their saxophone as a novelty item. The group release a sweltering onslaught of sax which breathes pure power into the songs. Grab the album here! 

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#4 Anoraak – Figure

Strap on the headphones and get ready to time-travel back to 2008. While that might not sound very appetizing at first, it will as you remember this was the year that Anoraak released the balmy classic “Nightdrive With You”. The single was a massive part of what kicked off the Valerie Collective scene and inspired hundreds of synthwave projects to come. He’s released two albums since that time, but new single “Figure” shows a return to this easy-breezy – yet oddly at the same time, haunting – style of music. Stream the entire EP here. 

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#5 Tangerine Dream – Charly the Kid (Dream Chimney extended dub)
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With what feels like the entire universe riding a Steven Spielberg/Stephen King dreamwave with the television sensation Stranger Things being just pure fucking magic, this extended dub edit of Tangerine Dream’s “Charly the Kid” from King’s movie Firestarter is all too fitting right now. The stretched out, psychedelic take on Tangerine Dream’s original track morphs it into an entirely new journey. With all due respect to S U R V I V E – the group who did a fantastic job scoring the show – I’m holding out hope that the creators welcome some older music for season 2. Not only would music like this fit effortlessly, but it should inspire a new generation of kids to discover films with strong scores like The Keep, Thief, Night Hawks, Inferno, Cat People, StarmanSilver Bullet and so many others.

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#6 Michael Schenker Group – Anytime

Since summer crushes and innocent fun have been covered, now we’re due for a heavy weeper. Don’t fret though, this beefy ballad packs 10cc’s of white-hot glory. “Anytime” is dedicated to all the lonely, middle-aged buff pumpers roaming the night in their Buick Grand Nationals and Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme’s, taking 30 second drags of Winston’s, all windows down, work boots still on, sandy mullets blowing in the breeze…maybe contemplating “patching it up” with the old lady.

I long for the days when atmosphere was such a ruthless force in hard rock/heavy metal songs. The guitar at the beginning conjures up chilly, summer evening breezes that tell us Autumn is about to rear it’s mighty head…

ruthless

3 Comments on “WET-HOT-TNUC-SUMMER, PART 4.

  1. Listen to The Midnight: “sounds cool…”. The all mighty sax starts: “Ok, I need to buy this stuff”.

  2. Anytime crushes – Did you ever go back to Rocky Point? If there’s any ruins left they must be menacing – The House of Horrors, The Matterhorn, The Clam Shack. Perfect excuse to grab some bikes, and hop on over a chained fence into a forbidden realm.

  3. Fuck yeah, UNCLE T! Great choices. MSG always crushes it. Both Schenker brothers shred the ax! Love the Stranger Things photo from the very first episode before Will disappears into the Upside Down by the Demogorgan. Hands down the greatest show on TV/Netflix and probably up there with my favorite first season of any series of all time. Can’t get enough of this show, the nostalgia and the music!

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