FROM THE DESK OF GIANNI ROSSI.

Posted on October 24, 2013     4 Comments

Gianni Rossi is an exceptionally difficult man to get in touch with. The famous Italian-Canadian film composer rarely leaves the shores of his private Mediterranean isle and has reportedly only come out of seclusion twice over the past decade, both occasions to commence work on horror scores, one for Gutterballs in 2009 and the other for Star Vehicle in 2011. TNUC had one rare opportunity to work with Rossi on a video edit for his cover of ‘C Beams’ a few years back, but that meeting of the maestros required TNUC to voyage some 6,000 miles to Rossi’s heavily guarded manor. While Rossi and TNUC collaborated under the same roof, they never once saw each other or made eye contact during the entire visit. Clear instruction was given that his privacy was paramount and we had to work in separate wings of his fortress at all times. On my final night I was pampered with massages from his 220 lb housekeeper/bodyguard Floriana and was served plates of Linguine Alle Vongole out on his gazebo. It was a weekend I’d surely never forget and would be my one and only “contact” with Rossi, until I received this letter on my doorstep yesterday…

Dear Sig. Tunc,

I would enjoy to share with you some favorite of selections from horror film musics. Musica which have been to inspire me for soundtracks of myself.  I will hope for you to enjoy and hope for you to share with your weblog homepage.  This mix is very short because of my computer access for while I would be here at rehab is very un poco.
THIS IS THE LINK FOR SMALL MIX: http://www.mediafire.com/?d8u955i1ve755v1
Ciao,
G.Rossi– –

1) Changes – Paul Zaza & Carl Zittrer (Prom Night)
“Is a fantastic song, no?  Z& Z make great song for this movie of stupid children with the funny guy and is not even funny presently.  And with daughter of great star Tony Curtis who maybe was not great father to let una figlia to be part of nonsense present.”
2) Whole World is Celebratin’ – Chris Farren (Night of the Comet)
“A triumph of a movie with this man Chris Farren who makes a great song that feels like to partying, even though mostly dies at the party.”
3) Darkest Side of the Night – Metropolis (Jason Takes Manhattan)
“Greatest song of the 1980’s, was made by a favorite band of mine.  I met Fred Mollin once, I think.  I am not able to have remembered, it might have been different Fred.”
4) I Still Believe – Tim Cappello (Lost Boys)
“What a man!  Fantastic song from movie for children of who are of being depressed.  Sig. Cappello, magnificent voice and saxophones.  Also performed keyboard for Tina Turner.  I was hired to tour for keyboard tech once with Tina Turner banda but I do not have memory of tour.  I think maybe would have been in rehab at that present.”
5) You’re Just What I’ve Been Looking For (Angela’s Theme) – Frank Vinci (Sleepaway Camp)
“This is very solid song, that which reminding me of Eurythmics and the way Frank Vinci canto la parola “Angayy” mostly sound like Mick Jagger, is great!  Excellent use for synthesizers e scatola batteria, making me to wish to be outside of rehab to making more musica!”

BODACIOUS HORROR BEDROOMS.

Posted on October 21, 2013     1 Comment

At the beginning of every autumn season since 1985, Uncle T says farewell to sunny California and flies to TNUC estates, located in the remote corner of the world known as Castle Rock, Maine. Similar to how you can count on just about every day in California being sunny with clear skies, during this time of year the air in Castle Rock is brisk, damp and eerily dark. It’s this type of climate that creates the ideal atmosphere for an ultimate, autumn-paradise getaway. Castle Rock also experiences a consistent mist flowing through the streets that locals say represents the trapped souls of dead prostitutes that used to cater to local fishermen back during the late 70’s. I’ll say this, it’s extremely similar to the fog roaming around the fictional town of Dunwich, seen in the Lucio Fulci classic ‘City of the Living Dead’.

The main wing of TNUC estates is a cliffside mansion, one that sits on the very tip of Castle Rock, overlooking the cold Atlantic. On any given night the silhouette of Uncle T can be seen in the highest attic window, rocking back and forth with the gleam of his single-dangly-cross-earring twinkling from the reflection of the moon. It’s here that he waits and listens to the rustling of leaves, the rumbling of a nearby ancient Indian burial ground, howling wind, waves crashing, and the sweet harmony of bloodcurdling teenage screams. He doesn’t partake in the outside carnage, but welcomes local psychopaths with open arms on to his property and encourages them to bring victims.
Over the years he’s collected a cluster of horror-movie items that are scattered throughout the home. This particular year he’s had a ravenous appetite for turning the master bedroom into a full-fledged horror spectacle. Something that will rival if not surpass the bedrooms seen in our favorite horror movies. This week TNUC counts down the top (3) bodacious horror bedrooms for inspiration:
#3 Terry from The Gate
1987’s The Gate introduced us to Terry, the young suburban headbanger and best friend of Glen. Terry has a lot going for him…he’s a red-head, wears glasses AND is fully immersed in metal & horror a.k.a. the perfect outcast. The kid even wears a Killer Dwarves patch on the back of his denim vest. By the looks of his bedroom it’s clear that at the core of Terry is molten metal, but we know he’s just as big of a horror fan, because heavy metal and horror go together like Pizza Hut and TMNT. When Terry’s not slam-dancing on his bed to Satanic metal, he’s launching rockets in the backyard and running from pint-sized demons with best bud Glen. To fully appreciate and understand this four-eyed metal warrior, you need to watch his solo performance, which features a monologue he does while wrapped up in a rainbow colored bed sheet. Go here to watch it when you’re done reading this post.
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#2 Tommy Jarvis from Friday the 13th Part 4: The Final Chapter

Played by a young Corey Feldman, Tommy Jarvis in Part 4 had a horror-spread in his bedroom that every monster kid would have drooled over. I read somewhere that special effects master Tom Savini was an inspiration for some of the development of this character. That makes sense when you watch scenes of Tommy showing new friend Rob his assortment of high-quality rubbery masks and his vampire/tremor hand puppet thing.
When Tommy’s not hanging out in his horror bedroom, he’s on boob-patrol for the new neighbors across the street, either catching a glimpse out his window or watching skinny-dipping babes by the lake. Plus he gets to live in a cabin in the woods and be terrorized by infamous Crystal Lake maniac Jason. This kid has it MADE.
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#1 Chainsaw from Summer School 
Interestingly our top pick in this category doesn’t pull from a horror movie but rightfully so, Chainsaw should have his own horror movie when you stop and think about it…but that’s an entirely different topic we’ll discuss some other time. Let’s begin the panoramic tour.
Masks lined wall-to-wall, gore props, posters, severed body props, zombie dummy heads, an eyeball stress ball, the legendary hand alarm clock, heavy metal pictures and so much more! Certain rooms in a house are good when they’re kept neat, organized and structured…but a horror bedroom ideally should look like what Chainsaw has done with it. He’s a non-minimalist and proud of it. There’s something so satisfying and personal about having a collection of top-quality, rubbery, pre-CGI horror items right in your bedroom. The place where you sleep at night!

Chainsaw and his gorehound wingman Dave are horror-obsessed to the point that they’re actually extremely talented in the art of splatter effects as seen in several classic gags in Summer School. They may have been flunking in math and social studies, but the teachers and administrators at Ocean Front High clearly had no clue as to what kind of geniuses they had dosing off in the back of their classrooms.

Honorable Mentions:
Billy in Creepshow
Eddie in Trick or Treat
Charles in No Small Affair
Michael in Brainscan

Almost forgot something…the axed brain on his table beside the bed!

LEGS!

Posted on October 18, 2013     3 Comments

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FUNHOUSES.

Posted on October 14, 2013     1 Comment

If you ventured into “funhouses” during the 1980’s and are living to tell about it, consider yourself lucky. Lucky that you aren’t DEAD + BURIED. Grandfather TNUC told tales of how kids were being swallowed up inside these things, and if Grandfather TNUC said it, consider it true. To this day, the entire concept of the carnival, fair or traveling amusement park is pretty terrifying to begin with. The typical deal is that a bunch of strangers roll into your city or town who have been tearing it up on the road for God knows how long, some of them possibly even born on the road, facing a lifelong sentence of being a carny. Rides are set up with just enough nuts + bolts installed the equipment to not kill anyone…but even if that happens, they’ll be packed up and off to the next town before a lawsuit or investigation can even begin. Normally trailer-semis unfold to what becomes the full-blown funhouse. Space is limited inside, which allows for elaborate wackiness and in-your-face hijinks. Curious ones like TNUC like to creep around to the backside of the funhouse to see how this magical transformation takes place, but quickly turn back and walk away after getting some rapey glares from the bearded lady and lobster boy who are on break, sharing a carton of cigarettes.

Presented so far is a pretty grim look at the funhouse, but I assure you TNUC is a longtime supporter of these places. The funhouse is a staple at the typical carnival, but probably remains the most unpopular attraction of the bunch. It’s an easy attraction to skip if you’re a thrill-seeker who paid to go on a ride that will have you hurling up that combination fried-dough-corn-dog you insisted on having. The next time you frequent the fair or carnival, take a stroll through the funhouse. The comic book-style artwork and design alone should lure you inside – it’s usually pretty impressive, many times with horror as a main focal point, which is a great feature if your fair comes around during the summer months (it’s like having an off-season haunted house). Blinking and fluorescent lights are peppered throughout the exterior and usually the carnies, being big heavy metal fans, blast this type of heavy metal to allure crowds over:

The inner-features of the funhouse vary from one carnival production to the next. If lucky you’ll get a walkthrough and you won’t be forced to ride in a foolish cart. Walkthroughs are appealing because it allows you and your group to roam free. If you happen to be on a hot carnival date, this might be your chance to seduce your partner behind a dark corner…just try to avoid being eaten by a ghoulie, clown or inbred carny-worker. Most commonly the entire walkthrough will be a maze consisting of such features as tipping/moving floors, strobe lights, distorting mirrors, dark corridors, loud noises, fog and strange smells……with a slam-damn guarantee on the bad smells.

My recommendation to people who have the unfortunate disadvantage of not being able to visit a nearby funhouse, your best bet is renting Ghoulies 2 or The Funhouse for the most accurate depiction of what generally happens inside. Take it as a warning!

Below, an abandoned funhouse.

CHAINSAW’S ALARM CLOCK.

Posted on October 10, 2013     2 Comments

No one on this planet wakes up as refreshed and ready to conquer the day like Francis “Chainsaw” Gremp. If you’re the type that has trouble waking up in the morning, my advice to you is to follow the advice of this horror-obsessed student from Ocean Front High..

Up and at em’! Just look at the expressions on his face throughout the sequence. Is that not how you’d like to wake up every morning? Sure, that blissful look is partly due to particular morning glory-symptoms from hazy dreams about the new Italian exchange student Anna-Maria, but the hand was a big help too. Go ahead and toss your digital alarm clocks in the garbage because this severed hand tickling your neck is all you’ll require for a proper way to start your day. TNUC will begin to examine Chainsaw’s amazing bedroom on post coming next week. Stay tuned..

COME TO ME.

Posted on October 7, 2013     2 Comments

As much as TNUC looks forward to a good ol’ homicidal, disfigured maniac stalking the streets after a pack of promiscuous teens, it’s nice to see the tables turn once in a while. In 1988’s Fright Night Part 2,  babe-vamp Regine Dandrige has big plans of avenging her brothers death (Jerry “Trench-coat” Dandrige) by turning young Charley Brewster into a bloodsucking creature of the night so that he can face the ultimate punishment that he deserves – immortality. Regine is quite the alluring hellcat who mesmerizes Charley with her sultry moves and tender touch.

TNUC likes to think of himself as someone who could easily turn away from Regine’s hypnotic eyes and find the strength to slay this nighttime biter…but if I ran into this sort of situation while Deborah Holland’s ‘Come to Me’ was playing in the background, forget it. I’d be neck-to-fangs with the she-bat and soon be living in eternal hell! But at least I’d be going out with a wonderful roll-in-the-hay with Regine Dandrige. It could be worse.

This song comes from the still-unreleased soundtrack to the film and capitalizes on one of the pivotal themes from the first Fright Night movie, Brad Fiedel’s ‘Come to Me’. The vocals on the original song were weak and didn’t produce the boner-chiling vibes that you’re hearing now. I always preferred the moodier instrumental, which we featured here on a post for CAMP TNUC back in 2009. Watching the sequel led me to realize that the song needed a woman’s touch, which happened when Deborah Holland was asked to cover the track. The music is taken to it’s sexual peak and I could not be happier with having this bootleg version from our bud Phaota which upon first listen made me feel like I was living in some VHS-sexual-dream-fantasy. Hopefully you experience similar symptoms. Enjoy.

MOLTEN HEAT