On this very day in 1985, Teen Wolf clawed its way into theaters across America. This under-appreciated slice of cinema has no business being as good as it is and I mean that in the best way possible. It’s a coming of age story about an average high school kid with issues like not getting noticed, being on a crappy basketball team, and turning into a werewolf…AND IT RULES ON EVERY CONCEIVABLE LEVEL.
Part of why Teen Wolf was slightly overlooked in 1985 was from being in the shadow of a mega-blockbuster classic called Back to the Future, Michael J. Fox’s other film released during the same summer of 85′. What a time to be alive.
Celebrate the film’s anniversary by grabbing some party snacks and queueing up Teen Wolf tonight. When you’re thirsty for more, here’s a download to the film’s pop soundtrack which features rip-roaring party hits, inspiring anthems and Miles Goodman’s synth score. Sadly, most of the score is still absent with no plans for an expanded edition on the horizon. Here’s hoping soundtrack revivalist companies like Waxwork and Death Waltz/Mondo read this!
Teen Wolf (Atlantic Releasing Corporation)
1) James House – Flesh On Fire
2) The Wolf Sisters – Big Bad Wolf
3) Mark Safan – Win in the End
4) Amy Holland – Shootin’ for the Moon
5) David Palmer – Silhouette
6) Mark Vieha – Way to Go
7) David Morgan – Good News
8) Miles Goodman – Transformation
9) Miles Goodman – Boof
If this face doesn’t scream “Lost-Legend” louder than anyone else, I don’t know what does. Congratulations to Billy Pratt from 1987’s summer-scorcher Overboard on claiming the spot for August’s Lost-Legend-Of-The-Month!
Wild Bill almost took home the Deadbeat-Of-The-Month prize during last year’s countdown, but he got shoved to the side and TNUC now feels really bad so we’re hoisting him up on the Lost-Legend platform of excellence. For some reason he works in both categories anyways.
Without reiterating the entire plot, Overboard stars Kurt Russell playing the role of Dean Proffitt, a single dad/carpenter/personal idol who gets hired to repair a closet on a yacht which is owned by a rich, pretentious husband and his horrendously snobby wife Joanna (Goldie Hawn). After the job is completed, Joanna whines about it not being up to her standards and refuses to pay Dean. She throws a tantrum and ends up tossing all of Dean’s tools in the ocean. Joanna ends up falling overboard and gets a bad case of amnesia, which inspires Dean to take advantage of the situation and convinces her that she’s his wife and mother of his rambunctious kids.
Billy is Dean’s best pal and drinking buddy. He proclaims that back in the day the two friends were known as “Mean Dean Proffitt” and “Bad Billy Pratt”. Since then they’ve spent their time bowling, pounding Miller High Life and chasing women of all shapes and sizes. While it’s not directly mentioned in the film, Billy’s reputation and local legend status in Elk Cove, Oregon is that he’s a supposed jack of all trades. During the scene where Dean tells Billy about how his tools were sent flying into the ocean, there’s a sign hanging on Billy’s trailer that reads BILLY PRATT. Contractor, Real Estate Agent, All Purpose Photography. “Whatever It Takes”. Billy’s many talents come in pretty handy for Dean when he asks him to do some early photoshop work on some photos in attempt to convince Joanna that they’ve been married for years. Another high score for Bill.
In one of his most memorable scenes, Billy puts on a classic pervert face as he stares at Joanna when she’s giving Dean an innocent foot massage. When she takes notice and whispers to Dean about it, he makes up a lie that she and Billy were high school sweethearts and then asks her “You don’t get any of the old feelings back when you look at him, do you?!”.
He might appear to be your average, every day slob drowning in grain alcohol at your town’s nastiest bar, but a closer look at scenes in the movie has Uncle T taking the high road with the belief that Billy simply hasn’t had a proper shot at life (definition of Lost-Legend). Not only does he go out of his way on separate occasions to help Dean out of the doghouse with Joanna but he’s also a co-inventor of Dean’s “Wonders of the World” miniature golf course dream.
Billy shows up in only a few scenes but leaves a strong presence still felt 28 years after the film’s release. Now we’re faced with questions that plague our minds… Where is Billy Pratt right at this moment? Did he in fact stick around with Dean years after the opening of “Wonders of the World”? Or did he have dreams of his own? How does he adjust to modern day society? So much has changed since 1986 but there’s no way in hell that this guy has altered his ways. Let’s be serious for a moment…Bad Billy Pratt isn’t driving a environmentally-friendly vehicle and shopping exclusively at Whole Foods. I refuse to believe it, and so should you.
To help everyone reflect on this Lost-Legend, here’s a classic cut from Alan Silvestri’s score to Overboard. Play this one on the boombox by the lake as summer camp comes to a close!
[Lost-Legend-Of-The-Month is a heartwrenching chronicle of forgotten iconic warriors who were either wiped off the face of the planet for reasons unknown or simply never got the chance to “peak” during their short-lived careers. We cherish these individuals and devote an entire month to celebrate their impact on society. To see the rest of em’, go here.]
Images courtesy of Monsterphotos.com
Face the facts, we’re long overdue for a discussion about MONSTER TRUCKS. It all started the other day as I was reclining on my alligator floatie in our tv/pool area watching Road House for the 700th time. The scene came up when Brad Wesley gives the “ok” look to one of his goons to proceed with driving a Monster Truck through Strodenmire’s car dealership, demolishing every perfectly good car in sight. It donned on me that we haven’t covered all-things MONSTER TRUCKS even at least once on TNUC. The sudden shock and confusion made my box of Keebler Magic Middles launching into the pool. If a small town-conquering, evil-doer like Brad Wesley understands the raw power of a pickup truck set on 66-inch wheels, so does Uncle T. mania
Call me trashy or a deadbeat, but I think classic-era Monster Trucks hold a special charm in the same category as say, American Gladiators and female mud wrestling. (Two subjects we’ve already covered here). Big, dumb and tons of fun.
This scene cost $500,000 to stage and was shot in a single take. They used a “Bigfoot 7” which was specially built for the movie. The guy operating the truck was Jim Kramer, the president of Bigfoot.
Did you know that the first “Bigfoot” was built in 1979 by an ex-construction worker from St. Louis? Bob Chandler turned his Ford F-250 pickup into something he could go off-roading with and promote his family’s 4×4 shop. He ended up making appearances with the truck at car shows and one day asked a local farmer if he could place two dilapidated cars in a field so that he could videotape himself crushing the cars with his “Bigfoot” as a joke. Shortly after the stunt, a motorsports promoter stepped into Chandler’s shop and caught the footage on the TV. He asked Chandler if he’d repeat the stunt in front of a crowd. Chandler agreed and in the following years cars were being demolished inside arenas across America, with imitators, sponsorships and thousands of screaming children and beer-annihilating adults. The behemoth on wheels gained so much popularity that it spawned toys, merchandise, appearances in movies and even an animated series in 85′ called Bigfoot and the Muscle Machines.
See, there are actually interesting things to learn about Monster Trucks. Beyond the brute strength of these vehicles and how they ranked during competitions, some of the names and artwork are just downright inspiring. Sometimes all you needed was a glance at the name or artwork painted down the side of a Monster Truck to feel its wrath. Some of these trucks may be long and gone but the crude tude’ and sheer nastiness remain in photographs.
Now it’s time for TNUC to countdown OUR top 10 MONSTER TRUCK MANIACS (With little information about these trucks, we’re purely basing this on “looks”!)
#10 HAWAIIAN PUNCH
Idea for parents trying to impress their kid with the ultimate birthday surprise…hire the “Hawaiian Punch” Monster Truck to crash the backyard birthday-pizza-party. Make sure he follows strict orders to 1) plow directly through your snobby neighbor’s hydrangea garden, 2) crush the inflatable rental jump-a-roo and 3) completely demolish the above-ground pool. PARTYTIME.
#9 NO PROBLEM!
You just gotta’ appreciate the positive attitude of this carefree slayer of automobiles that calls himself “No Problem!”. Stacks of cars in his path? No problem! Engine meltdown? No problem! No seatbelts? No problem! No sober driving allowed? No problem! Not caring that the gal you scored with at the lake last night was your 1st cousin? No problem!
#8 STROH’S STRIDER
Leave it to one of the premiere kings of ‘deadbeat beers’ to create their own Monster Truck. OF COURSE Stroh’s needed to be involved. It really is such a perfect marriage. Paulie from the Rocky movies should be driving this thing around Philadelphia screaming at people in his signature deadbeat language.
#7 HOT STUFF
Rumor has it that Kip Winger from the band Winger is now the proud owner of this rompin’ and stompin’ Jeep CJ-7. Every day he drives “HOT STUFF” up and down Daytona Beach with his sunglasses on, chewing gum ecstatically with his oily bicep extended out the side door, giving a thumbs up to every buxom babe in sight. Nah, just kidding. Would be the ideal situation, though.
“Excaliber” was one of the more popular monsters throughout monster truck history who lasted a lifespan from 1985 to 2013. I definitely lean towards the simpler “old pickup on cocaine” style of Monster Trucks, rather than some of the more intricate and crazy body work styles of today. Plus, how can you not fall in love with that photo? A 13,000 lbs Chevy soaring through a cigarette-hazed filled arena. It’s magic.
At the Halloween Havoc pay per view in 1995, Hulk Hogan’s “Hulkster” truck pushed Giant’s “Dungeon of Doom” truck out of the circle for the win in what WCW had named a “Sumo Monster Truck” match. The rules were that you had to get both sets of axels out of the ring, which was 100 ft. in diameter. Pretty dumb, yes, but still riveting entertainment. (WATCH HERE). Hulk’s truck was a “Bigfoot” model and featured his bulging, hot dog colored arms on each side of the vehicle. Besides Hogan, WCW also built custom trucks for Sting, Medusa, Goldberg, NWO and Macho Man!
#4 BIG BEAR
There’s just something about the current status of this abandoned “Big Bear” truck that’s both sad and intimidating. The weeds and shrubbery have grown around it so perfectly that it almost looks like it’s part of a horror movie scene. They should turn this area into a haunted maze of forgotten, abandoned Monster Trucks with surprise truck driver corpses popping out to scare people.
HAVE MERCY, I don’t even WANT to know what goes on in back of this “Heavy Metal” van. That’s right, even vans often times showed up during Monster Truck events. For some reason they remind me of that chunky metalhead bully that you had shop class with in high school.
#2 GRAVE DIGGER
The main event of Monster Truck events was and still is the eerie beast known as “Grave Digger”. From what creator/driver Dennis Anderson can make a 10,000 pound vehicle do in the air to the mystique behind the behemoth, Grave Digger will never stop. In the Monster Truck universe it’s the equivalent of The Undertaker in the WWE.
The truck started off as a simple ‘mud bogger’ (an off-roading event involving 4×4’s) but after Anderson volunteered to drive the 1951 Chevy Panel Truck at a Monster Truck event after one of the scheduled trucks pulled a no-show, the Grave Digger saga was born. The truck was an instant success with Anderson’s aggressive and no-holds-barred driving style. He left the art of mud bogging to pursue a lifetime of Monster Trucks.
The truck got it’s name from when Anderson was trash talking with some of his trucker compadres’ and said “I’ll take this old junk and dig you a grave with it”, referencing the age of his old truck compared to their modern trucks. In 1986 the truck received its famous foggy graveyard paint job. The bloody lettering, green flames, ghost skull, haunted house and tombstones displaying the names of competitors are crucial features of Grave Digger and really haven’t changed much since its first incarnation roughly 30 years ago. For this we applaud Grave Digger. *(Look out for TNUC’s Spookiest Monster Trucks countdown, coming this October)*
#1 VOICEOVER GUY
Our #1 pick isn’t even a Monster Truck because it’s something far more loud and destructive. It’s the #1 Monster Truck voice-over commercial guy. The guy who could say something like “rubber baby buggy bumpers” and have you curled up in a fetal position on the couch holding onto your favorite stuffed animal with fear.
Not to discourage other voiceover people in the Monster Truck community, but there’s really only one master. I’ve been obsessed with this guy’s bloodcurdling voice for YEARS. Every time I’m driving down the street and catch one of his commercials on the radio I blast it as loud as possible. Unfortunately at this moment I could only find this one crappy video on YouTube, but the hunt for more is ON. I must find out who this demonchild is, where the dungeon he records this stuff is, how he got his voice to sound so demonic and finally, hire him to perform something exclusive for TNUC. If you disciples have any information regarding the ultimate Monster Truck voice-over guy, please consult Uncle T.
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We hope you enjoyed reading about Monster Trucks. If you made it this far, you rule. Stay tuned to our Instagram for the upcoming #MonsterTruckMonday feature! (Thanks again to Monsterphotos.com)
By now longtime subscribers to TNUC probably think I’m biased when it comes to any music released by Zombi, Majeure, Lovelock, Contact, Gianni Rossi and the rest of the Steve Moore and AE Paterra projects. Truth be told, these synth tycoons simply create the best sounding electronic music in today’s market.
The meatiest of these projects is ZOMBI, Moore and Paterra’s first and probably best-known creation. My first listen to the band was back in 2006 when they released ‘Surface to Air’, a record melted my melon directly on impact. Since then, Uncle T has been a big fan of pretty much everything they deliver.
It was announced yesterday that Zombi will return to release their 6th studio effort Shape Shift on October 16th via Relapse Records. In a recent interview Moore had this to say: “It’s a rock record — think of it as a follow-up to [2006’s] Surface to Air,”…”There are no techno jams or symphonic prog fantasies. No solo track interludes. We have officially moved from ‘studio project’ mode back into ‘live band’ mode.”
Listen to ‘Pillars of the Dawn’ and listen loudly. If this track is any indication of what the rest of the album will sound like, we’re all in for a long, dark and sketchy treat. ‘Pillars’ is Zombi blatantly telling us that they’re NOT FUCKING AROUND IN 2015. As much as I love the band’s more ambient work of the past few years, this percussion + synth + bass + ludes’ serum is tremendously refreshing to ingest. With the recent resurgence of synth-based soundtracks and bands heading into more electronic territory on albums, Uncle T was suffering from a slight overkill of keyboards. Zombi however, play this music with the attitude of a classic rock band and it’s seriously exhilarating. That old, familiar feeling of an instrumental version of Rush jamming with a pack of Italian horror maestros inside Disney’s Space Mountain was what drew my attention to this band in the first place.
Apparently Zombi have experienced a surge of enlightenment over the last year or so which is presumably from touring with legendary Italian soundtrack masters Goblin. Steve Moore has also been busy scoring such films as 2014’s The Guest, the upcoming Cub, and later this year with The Mind’s Eye. The forthcoming Shape Shift should see Zombi not pulling any punches and doing what they do best: making celestial, sinister, otherworldly, lurking, proggy synth-rock. THE REAL DEAL. Be afraid, be very afraid.
Hey, remember this?…