Let it be known that the promise of a better and brighter tomorrow begins with one man…Big Mike. As for today, we have the distinguished honor of premiering his debut music video for Wat sull dä Quatsch?, which in English translates to What’s All the Fuss? The song is our first glimpse at the 5-track EP he’ll be releasing soon and features beloved Italo disco pioneer Gianni La Bamba handling synth duties. This video is a very accurate depiction of a day in the life for Mike. If you’ve been a longtime apostle of Deutschland’s #1 export, you already know how crucial his gospel is to mankind. For you newcomers, let me try and spell it out to you the best way I can. But bare with me, it’s 5 a.m. as I write this passage and I’ve just reenacted everything that happens at the end of the video. Here goes nothing…

Take all your favorite wrestling legends and mash them up with a couple of heavy metal’s finest chosen warriors. Now sprinkle that with your favorite, iconic, explosive, action gurus of yesterday. Then add a gallon of Pina Colada mix. Throw all of that into a giant protein shake blender and press MIX. The concoction is now complete. What stands before you is BIG MIKE. So come with him if you want to live! 

Big Mike on Facebook
Instagram @bigmikecolonia 

Meet n’ Greet Opportunity:

**This just in: Big Mike will be joining Uncle TNUC next month in May for a 30-day California adventure which begins in Los Angeles. We’ll be hitting all the essential points and breaks of the western shoreline and BBD’ing any inkling of a proper long-butt that comes in our direction. We’re also conducting meet n’ greets with fans which can be arranged by emailing! Unfortunately Gianni La Bamba won’t be visiting L.A. because he’s knee-deep in a restoration project of one of his old discos in Italy (see below)**

(for those of you who don’t speak German, I urge you to head to the comment section of this post and read the lyrics to this song, as transcribed by Uncle T himself. Play the video again and follow along!)



    In the bar, there's a lot goin' on tonight 
    i'm looking around, foxes everywhere in sight
    hot leather-clad women, running about
    torn denim, perms and blouses teased with plenty of fluff
    you step up to me and there’s a twinkle in your eye that says you've got a beautiful muff
    telling me you're not a woman like that though
    but for one night, let’s not just make out…

    what's all the fuss, come snort with me
    cos on coke you can fuck like a wild bull
    what's all this fuss, come snort with me
    high as a kite you can fuck like a wild bull

    Oh Oh Oh!

    my car's parked right outside the door
    one more drink then we’ll head to my house
    you say “mike I don’t do that” (cocaine)
    i say, “sex on powder, that's what's really bitchin’”
    Yes I love this champagne, but my nostrils are itchin’
    Lines of blow unleashes the testosaurus in me
    So have a snort and you'll be happy until the sun rises

    what's all the fuss, come snort with me
    cos on coke you can fuck like a wild bull
    what's all this fuss, come snort with me
    high as a kite you can fuck like a wild bull

    (Repeat refrain)

  2. I must say I missed a little of his natural musical wrath and also, that is A LOT of cocaine. Oherwise, Big Mike dielivered.

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