MAXIMUM RESPECT, ELLIO’S PIZZA.
I know Uncle T goes on and on about the bigger pizza conglomerates like Pizza Hut all the time, but the true key to the heart of TNUC’s youth was good old frozen microwavable pizza from Ellio’s.
I love Ellio’s so much that when I hear people talk bad about it, I get angry.
How could anyone have anything bad to say about Ellio’s? I’m not really sure and frankly now I don’t give a fuck. These little frozen pizzas have ROCKED my existence for the last 30 years and this feeling hasn’t shown any signs of slowing down.
To honor this legacy at the Land of TNUC, below is a list of the things I cherish about Ellio’s Pizza!
THE ACTUAL PIZZA.
This sounds obvious, but I have to clarify that my love for this delicious cuisine isn’t only burning deep in my nostalgic psyche. Still to this day, it’s seriously DAMN GOOD. While companies like DiGiorno get all the front page news for trying hard to be as good as takeout pizza restaurants, Ellio’s isn’t trying to be anyone but Ellio’s. Those 3 squared little slices are unique in that it can be a snack, meal or an appetizer for distinguished guests. It flat out just works. Uncle T’s personal taste preference is to slightly overcook the pizza in a toaster oven, add a little hot sauce, then burn the roof off my mouth instead of waiting for it to cool.
REFUSING TO CHANGE.
Aside from McCain selling Ellio’s in 2015 to Dr. Oetker and expanding it’s variety into 8 different crust and topping configurations, Ellio’s hasn’t changed what makes them great. All the pizza companies have altered their flavors and tastes over the years in attempts to keep up with trends. Ellio’s tastes exactly the same as it did when I was 6 years old. There’s something to be said about that. MAXIMUM RESPECT!
I’m specifically referring to the smell of the box. It sounds crazy, but one of the things I’d love to bottle up and spray myself with like cologne before I leave the house is the scent of an Ellio’s box. Something about the way the frozen mozzarella cheese mixes with that cheap cardboard makes my nostrils go to heaven. **Bonus points if your mom packed Ellio’s for school lunch so your entire lunch bag was an Ellio’s explosion. ***Extra bonus points if the pizza slices were soggy and wrinkly by lunchtime. It somehow made it taste better!THE TURTLES.
When it comes to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, it’s only natural to start thinking of pizza. From there it’s normal to have cravings for Pizza Hut and Domino’s because of their giant promotional ties to the TMNT franchise. Well I have news for people who’s memories are foggy…ELLIO’S was another sponsor that’s much less talked about.
The company started a TMNT: The Movie collector cards series in 1990 that featured little cut-outs on the back of the pizza boxes. They also introduced special edition Turtles pizza boxes with a few wacky toppings. A ritual of mine became lining up the cards on the carpet while I watched the live action movie over…and over…and over again.
Uncle T realizes that Ellio’s is a regional thing, so this article may not have resonated with the entire world. So thank you for reading!
I grew up with Ellio’s and I’m proud to say that now I’m getting old with Ellio’s. ∇